Secrecy

Secrecy is the foundation for power and control. I have secrets. You have secrets. The government has secrets. Would you like to know what they are? Would it make your life or mine better if we knew each others secrets? The absolute truth...all of them. Would you benefit from knowing the way i live my life and how i get by day to day? Would it benefit me to know if you care or not? Would it benefit us all if we knew the governments ways for maintaining power and control?

How much more powerful do you think you could be if you exposed all that you are or have been, good , bad, ugly? I am curious to know how keeping these secrets makes us feel in control or upholding a sense of power.

If you were promised to not lose power or control or even to gain more, would you care to share some of your secrets......

The Hubby

A moment in our relationship happened the other day that we were discussing in a very positive way. And from that discussion came these words,

                             "...I don't want the old you..."

And it brought a tear to my eye.

Ok, maybe it was more than a few (for those who know the passionate side of me) But I did something the other day that I felt like reminded him of when we first got together...what I've been referring to as the old me in other discussions we've had. And it has been a discussion off and on for sometime since we got married because there had been a definite and clear change in who I was in the relationship when we married. And its not some MAJOR change, like I instantly became some recluse or worse, some old nag....haha. Its just that we had a lot of trust to rebuild and we had to apply alot more of Faith "from this day forward." And I think I felt that he needed me to be that person again.


He said he accepted the change because he knew the circumstances that led to it and his role in it. But that made it like he owed me for the rest of the marriage for the scandal before the marriage. But I have to say that it was one of the nicest things he had said to me and one of the most liberating moments for us both. The love is a little deeper, you know...when you just...................smile......

another small step for married-kind.

Bath-time photos child pornography?

Last fall A.J. and Lisa Demaree took a memory stick with family photos to the printing center at the Wal-Mart store in Peoria, Ariz. Some of the photos showed their three young girls, all under 5 years old, partially nude in the bathtub. The Demarees say these were innocent pictures that all families take. But a Wal-Mart employee felt otherwise and contacted the police who agreed that this was a child pornography situation.

The Demaree's lawyer released this photo to show the pictures of the girls are innocent.

A report issued by Peoria authorities described the photos as "child erotica" and "sex exploitation."

Child Protective Services searched the Demaree home and took custody of the children for a month while the state investigated. The watched family videotapes and found a few in which the children were playing unclothed. Lisa was suspended from her school job for a year, and both of their names were placed on the sex offender registry. The couple spent $75,000 on legal bills.

The Demarees were eventually cleared of any charges and their daughters returned, but they are now suing the state and Wal-Mart for what they call unfair accusations.

"Ninety-nine percent of the families in America have these exact same photos."Lisa told "GMA." "I even worry about them in their bathing suits now, if I get a shot of them in their bathing suits and they're tilting their heads a certain way or their hips are sticking out a little bit, all I think of is 'Does someone think that it was posed? Or how is that going to be perceived?'"

What do you think? Are bath-time photos innocent or child pornography?

Sorries

I always hate it when its one in the morning and I have a million and one thoughts on my mind. Its quiet, the family is asleep and I am left to my own thoughts that have taunted me throughout the day:

1. chuck is checking out. he is my moms neighbor who loaned us the 3k that was so sadly stolen from us. and he only has 6 weeks, if not less, to live. in an instance he has forgotten who everyone is and his health has deteriorated. It leaves you feeling empty, angry, and sad. We thanked him in word but not properly with repayment before he goes. No welcome to the new restaurant you helped start. eegghh. it kinda makes me feel so very sad.

2. why is "he" ignoring me? why the f- do i care? why am i not running off with him to get married? why am i asking these questions? im not angry at the fiance anymore so why am i nervous? this wedding stuff really makes me anxious...

3. i miss my "ex". i think he called. i cant prove it. it sounded like her voice when i called back the number on caller id. his wife, ya know. thats cool. he needs to stick with her. i did what God asked and let him go but i really thought he would just be gone. I wonder though if all is good. That i wonder. I know they wont and havent split, even though he tried to make me feel bad that they had. so i just wanna know hes ok. maybe thats a sign he is. hey i dont even think i ever told that story....

so many people i wanna say sorry to.