My Brother

I do love him. I had a dream when I was younger -10 or 11- that I was standing in our window, and it was a big bay window, at our house and he was out on the street with this old man being taken away. I was screaming for him, at him and he couldnt hear me. And he just disappeared.

My brother is in a really bad place. Now I have been in my own very tight spots but his is a doozy. Hes got jail time and it makes some other matters worse. I know that this place of hurt and lack are temporary but I cant make him hear that. He's gotta hear it from God. And I feel for him. I am always afraid though he wont see that there is a corner to turn and one day we will get a tragic phone call. I remember the days when I wanted to take my life. I remember the days when I did try to take my life. It was such a dark place. And my brother is in that spot. I wish I knew God then like I know him now. I pray tonight to God to thank him for being the light in our life even when we dont see it or know it. Whatever the outcome is, we will have the strength.

I also pray for another boy who is sad and is always running. I pray that he ends up somewhere safe and warm tonight and that the trouble he will most likely find himself in will actually move him into a new place too. Out of the darkness.

All this is so random because I dont know what to say about either. I dont know what to say or how to fix it. im sure im not being asked to say or fix but Im just lost.